Follow up

The doctor told me I have a nodule in each lung. He is not sure if it’s cancerous or not, but with my history I have to be careful. The nodules are too small to biopsy to confirm if they are cancerous. Also during my colon and rectum resection, the surgeon found one lymph node which was cancerous. They were able to remove the lymph node along with 12 other nodes that did not have cancer. Since the node tested positive for cancer and with the additional new nodules in my lungs, 2-3 months of chemotherapy was the recommendation. I will be meeting with my thoracic surgeon and other oncologist for a second opinion this Thursday. They were wonderful for squeezing me in during a busy week.

Not the news I wanted to hear this morning. Today has been a strange day. I woke up this morning and could not fall back asleep because I was anxious about the scan. I exercised, took a shower, ate some eggs with a cup of hot tea (no coffee for me anymore) and went to the hospital to find out if I had cancer. After the doctor’s visit, went grocery shopping, ate dinner and then went to my daughter’s Christmas play, where she played a sheep. After the Christmas play, put Anabel to bed, my parents watched Katie while Janie and I went Christmas shopping. Why do I write this? Because life happens. No matter if I want to slow it down, pause, or fast-forward I can’t. I can’t stop living my life or cancer is winning. Cancer is always in the back of my mind. This is how my life is going to be and it’s okay because I’m going to be okay.

Scanxiety

On Tuesday I have my first CT scan since my surgeries.  The purpose of the scan is to see if they got all of the cancer and if there’s any new cancer.  The week leading up to a scan is always up and down for me.  This time is no different.  I’m not worried about the doctors missing anything with my surgeries, I’m more worried about having new cancer elsewhere.

Since this is the giving season, please give me some prayers and good vibes this Tuesday for a clean scan.